At His Funeral, His Mother Tossed A DNA Report Onto His Coffin-Tep

The church smelled like white lilies, candle smoke, and expensive perfume.

Sarah stood beside her husband’s coffin with one hand under her belly and the other resting on the polished wood, trying to keep her knees from giving out.

David had been gone four days.

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Only four days earlier, two police officers had come to their Manhattan home after midnight, standing under the porch light with rain on their jackets and that careful, quiet look people wear when they are about to destroy your life.

They told her David’s car had gone off the Pacific Coast Highway.

They told her the investigation would take time.

They told her they were sorry.

They did not tell her how to walk back into the kitchen and see his coffee mug still sitting by the sink, the handle turned toward his favorite chair like he might come back and reach for it.

They did not tell her how to sleep on his side of the bed because hers suddenly felt too empty.

They did not tell her how to face his family.

Now the front of the church was packed with flowers, silver frames, bowed heads, black coats, and the soft rustle of funeral programs.

David smiled from the printed cover in Sarah’s purse, the same easy smile he had used when he found her eating cereal over the sink at midnight and teased her for refusing to sit down.

She was eight months pregnant.

Her black dress pulled tight over her stomach, her ankles ached inside her flats, and the baby kept shifting under her palm as if he could feel every whisper around them.

The church was warm, but Sarah felt cold.

David’s mother, Eleanor Whitmore, stood across the coffin from her, dry-eyed and perfect.

Eleanor’s silver hair was pinned into a smooth knot.

Her black dress looked tailored within an inch of its life.

She had accepted condolences all morning like she was receiving guests at a private club, one gloved hand out, one practiced nod at a time.

People admired women like Eleanor because they mistook control for strength.

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