Her Coffin Moved During the Funeral, and Her Family Turned Pale-heuh

I stood beside my pregnant wife’s coffin trying to look like a man who still belonged inside his own body.

The funeral parlor smelled like lilies, furniture polish, candle wax, and the cold chemical sweetness they use when they want death to look peaceful.

Nothing about Chloe looked peaceful to me.

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Her cheeks were too still.

Her mouth was too carefully arranged.

Her hands rested over the curve of her stomach as if someone had posed her into motherhood one last time.

Our daughter was inside her.

That was the sentence my mind kept trying to say and failing to survive.

Our daughter was inside her.

Behind me, Eleanor Vanguard was speaking in a low, hard voice to the funeral director about timing.

Not prayers.

Not Chloe’s favorite song.

Timing.

The reception window, the private family viewing, the public statement, the memorial foundation language.

Even at her daughter’s funeral, Eleanor sounded like she was chairing a board meeting.

Preston stood beside her in a charcoal suit so expensive it looked like it had never known weather.

He had one hand in his pocket and the other wrapped around a paper coffee cup from the funeral home lobby, as if grief had mildly inconvenienced his afternoon.

I heard him murmur, “We need to get Liam through this without another scene.”

Another scene.

That was what they called it when I cried at the hospital.

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